we're having our first fight.

yes, i am currently feeling angry at my unborn son. see, the problem is, he sees himself as completely comfortable in my belly and i disagree. my abs hurt from all the contractions (every single night) this past week, i'm frustrated that i missed out on a lot of fun things this holiday weekend so we could stay close to home "just in case", and i'm starting to feel like he just might prove everyone wrong and decide to never come out. i've found myself wondering what the world record is for "longest labor".

my friend haley mentioned the other day that she thinks a baby's labor can usually be linked to their personality later on in life. it made perfect sense to me...i was born 3-4 weeks early and i am incredibly impatient! what worries me is that this perfectly content baby boy is going to grow up to frustrate his impatient mother time and time again (not unlike his father, who is also one of the most easygoing people i've ever known!).

our health insurance is changing as of june 1, which is also making me anxious. i don't think it's going to change very much...but we all know how fun it is to receive surprise insurance bills weeks after having some kind of medical procedure! it just would have been so much easier if he'd been born today or earlier. but that doesn't look like it's in the cards right now. i've been doing all the "natural induction" methods...pineapple, spicy foods, walking...you name it, we've done it! the problem isn't that i can't get contractions to start...the problem is KEEPING THEM GOING!!

anyway, my complete state of grumpiness is now turning me into a recluse. don't be surprised if you e-mail, call, or text me and i don't respond. i just don't see the point in turning my wrath on some innocent, curious friend or bystander for now.

the answers to your questions are:
yes, i'm still pregnant
no, i'm not feeling comfortable
yes, we're very READY for this baby to be born!
no, i don't know if i'm dilated or effaced
yes, i'm still having contractions
no, there's nothing we can do to help speed this thing along to accommodate your busy schedule

now, if you're not here to bring me watermelon or some other delicious treat, you can be on your way.