pregnancy used to be fun

38 weeks -
ugh, i just need to vent today. i've been having pretty consistent cramping (like the feeling before you get your period) since yesterday around 2 PM. at 5:30, i had a sudden extreme bout of restlessness so tyler and i took a nice, quick-paced walk around the neighborhood (i haven't walked that fast since before i got pregnant!). hoping it would bring on some actual contractions, i also bounced on my birth ball for about an hour or so (which caused some definite pain, but still no contractions). i went to bed feeling like maybe the baby had dropped a little lower. but other than that, no real signs of progress yet...just lots of cramps and general discomfort.

and the moodiness!!!! i'm extremely tired today and i just don't feel like being around people one bit. i'm tired of these stupid maternity clothes (and the heat isn't making it any easier), i'm tired of the constant guessing game (will this sudden pain lead to full-blown contractions?), and i'm tired of the rude and ridiculous comments i get from total strangers (either "wow, you're about to pop!" or "oh, you've still got a while left"), none of which have been helping me feel any more patient or relaxed about this baby's timing! i've had people tell me not to let my water break on them (um, like i have a choice?) and i'm absolutely LOVING the "you're STILL pregnant?!" comments! in the beginning of this pregnancy, i thought things might be a little easier at the end if i just didn't tell anyone my due date. this really only served to piss off my friends and family, who i now realize would have been nothing but excited and supportive...and it still hasn't helped to ward off the rude and nosy strangers! sometimes when strangers ask when i'm due, i'll try the sarcastic "not soon enough!" response, hoping that will appease their curiosity...but it's amazing to me how some people still absolutely INSIST that you tell them an actual date!! do you know how small the percentage is of women who actually have their babies on their due date??? it's a completely arbitrary day to me, so much so that most days i honestly even forget what it is! but...since i've realized most people have pretty much figured it out by now anyway, i'm going to tell you what it is. ready?? my due date is june 4th. there, i said it. now, that being said, i still want you to forget the date i just told you, stop reading this wherever you are, and start sending prayers/thoughts/vibes/whatever that i will have this baby TODAY because i can almost guarantee that if i'm still pregnant on june 4th, i will be an absolute MONSTER and should not be held accountable for anything i might say, do, or think from that day forward.